A series of anecdotes with or without any connection to the running of a restaurant.

Monday, November 13, 2006

Talking to a brick wall...

The Vagina Monologues was created from over 200 intimate conversations award-winning playwright Eve Ensler had with women. These exchanges were funny, poignant, unusual and sometimes tragic. Women talked about their relationships, their sexual experiences and said things they never dreamed of revealing, even to their closest friends.

I haven't seen it and I doubt very much whether I'd ever have the guts to go and sit among parties of women proudly screaming the C... word!
At last performance I am told that only half a dozen men were in the audience! Masochists! One was heckled by one of the performers and laughed at by the audience as he headed for the toilet!

It prompted me to think of "witty repartees" like...

"Does yours fancy a dialogue? "
"Out of 8000 vaginal nerve endings I always manage to hit the wrong one!"
"Can't talk with my mouth full!"
The show has been banned from many countries.

I wonder whether a man will rise to the occasion and write something on the same lines...

Penal Chronicles?
Dick Tutorial?
Can you think of any more?


Blogger Daphne Wayne-Bough said...

Talking Bollocks. Because you all do.

Why do we still need plays like this? Women's lib has been around for 40 years. Haven't we got the hang of it yet?

13/11/06 2:54 PM  
Blogger Caroline said...

If you want to see it you could always go in drag - just remember to go to the women's loos or you'll blow your cover...

13/11/06 6:03 PM  
Blogger Caroline said...

Oh and if anyone comments on the moustache I've heard that some lesbians are very keen on growing their own...

13/11/06 6:04 PM  
Blogger lettuce said...

Willy Wonka?

13/11/06 7:09 PM  
Blogger ValGalArt said...

Schlong soliloquies?

13/11/06 7:47 PM  
Anonymous guyana-gyal said...

Well, there is a man version. Two fellas from Australia, doing puppetry of the penis. Was on HBO and all, I heard.

13/11/06 11:26 PM  
Blogger cream said...

Yep, I agree with you Daphnee! That's all we talk us men! And what do YOU talk about, then?

Caro, that's a good suggestion! The only one I know is gorgeous and no facial hair anywhere!

Lettuce, ...and melted chocolate?

Val, that's the first time I've heard it called Schlong! Honest!

Gigi, I've seen that show on telly! And it was on live at the Edinburgh Fringe!... I heard!

13/11/06 11:51 PM  
Blogger Cherrypie said...

Cock Tales are always a favourite at Happy Hour.

14/11/06 1:29 AM  
Blogger Christine said...

I have to say how surprised I was at the Vagina Monologues. I actually enjoyed it. David's grandmother has been to puppetry of the penis and if it ever comes our way again, she's promised to take me. I must see the hamburger and the Eiffel tower. ;)

14/11/06 5:53 AM  
Blogger Sal DeTraglia said...

"For Members Only."

14/11/06 7:21 AM  
Blogger cream said...

Cherrybabe, I thought you'd go for something to wet the whistle! Wet Blanquette de Limoux??

Christine, the hamburger is a bit cheesy! The Eiffel tower, a great erection!

Sal, as long as members are well behaved! We wouldn't want them to start acting like Richard Craniums!

14/11/06 9:31 AM  
Blogger Tess Tennison said...

Moustaches indeed!

14/11/06 2:45 PM  
Blogger Daphne Wayne-Bough said...

Actually I didn't think much of the book, and have no desire to go and see the play. Call me old fashioned, but I am a Laydee and cannot utter the c*** word even with the lights out. Oh I've come over all flushed, think I'm going to have a fit of the vapours .... (swoons).

14/11/06 3:10 PM  
Blogger cream said...

Kitty, any Whiskas? hahaha

Daphnée, I wouldn't think that you would know how to spell the word let alone say it!
But I have been told that it was shouted out very loud on several occasions!

14/11/06 5:28 PM  
Blogger LDahl said...

"A Night with Johnson"
Cream... I never know what you will come up with next...... oh, lord, I've got such a bad mind. I had better start mending my evil ways, not getting any younger you know. My kids and their spouses have corrupted me!! (Yeah, that's right, it's all their fault...heheh)
You could probably get the DVD... I saw it with my daughter and son-in-law..I remember it was funny in a few places and not as "uncomfortable" as I thought it would be. Then I promptly forgot it(see, I know how to be a Lady too, have Victorian Amnesia!)

14/11/06 9:30 PM  
Anonymous guyana-gyal said...

I just remembered...some Guyanese women performed it here but I didn't go. For some reason I just wasn't interested.

I wonder if men here were heckled too, by the women.

14/11/06 9:34 PM  
Blogger cream said...

L, that's another name I hadn't heard of! Johnson!
Fancy being led astray by the young ones!

Gigi, I can imagine the laughs they got in Guyana. But I doubt whether your macho men would've gone to watch the show!

15/11/06 9:33 AM  
Blogger muddy red shoes said...

I saw it with my daughter, it was fantastic, the best bit was sitting in a theater full of women (one poor man) and some of them in their 80's all shouting the c word, proudly. It is a word that I like, my youngest boy when he was about 6 told me it was his favorite word because it sounded full and roundy!

15/11/06 9:46 PM  
Anonymous cream said...

Full and roundy! My word, Sarah your son was very advanced for his years!
I think one has to be a woman to really understand what it feels like to say that word out loud.
It's like swearing. It really means what it is supposed to mean only if you swear in your own language.

15/11/06 10:38 PM  
Blogger homo escapeons said...

The Vagilogues was very funny and the shock value was replaced with a weird sense of commonplace very quickly.
We Canadians of course have a severe case of sphincter clenching uptightness that is a weird blend of Puritanism and Victorian Prudery (a exception pour les maniaque sexuels au Quebec) so we need to exhale once and a while.

All we guys ever do is talk about our dicks..who would go see a play about that?
A man's Best Friend can be his own Worst Enemy!

16/11/06 5:50 AM  
Blogger Trac said...

Oh very good Sal!

16/11/06 5:09 PM  
Blogger cream said...

Pauvres Québequois!
I like your choice, HE. Especially the worst enemy bit!

Welcome back, Trac! How was Spain?

16/11/06 5:55 PM  
Blogger Donna said...

Willy Wonderings
Scrotal Soliloquy

Oh no this could get silly, I'm off ;-)

16/11/06 7:36 PM  
Blogger Daphne Wayne-Bough said...

The C word can be the scariest word in the English language when bellowed by a drunken man in a Sarf London accent. Especially if he's bellowing at you.

Something so fragrant and welcoming should be given a nicer name than that. Something like Pocahontas. Or Tondelayo. Or Fanny.

16/11/06 8:12 PM  
Blogger carla said...

Hmmmm...Phallus Patter, Tool Time, Dong Discourse... yikes! I heard that someone's considering opening the male's answer to "Hooters" restaurants... "Packages."

And that's all the dirty talk you'll get from me!

16/11/06 10:05 PM  
Blogger cream said...

Dons, are you sure it's not "Willy wandering..."? You're ok! You can be as silly as you want, girl!

Daphnee, yes I agree it can be very fragrant and welcoming! But who the hell is Tondelayo?

Carla, dirty talk? Come on! Sounds more like biology!

16/11/06 11:56 PM  
Blogger Christine said...

I enjoyed the play but I can't say the C-word either.

19/11/06 4:53 PM  
Blogger christina said...

I LOVE the comments on this. :-) I'm one of those uptight Canadians who had never even whispered the C-word.

20/11/06 8:14 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home